Unsurprisingly, Christmas in China has been very different. Fortunately, however, there has been no shortage of festive spirit…
There was the usual run-up to Christmas last week as the students began to get excited about a holiday they don’t understand, and us teachers did the classic trick of filling lessons with Christmas films and parties. I got my classes to make Christmas cards and most of them came back to me, with very sweet, affectionate messages about how much they love me. It is no coincidence that their exams are next week...
I also received a number of presents from my students, the best of which came from one of my fresher classes. I had to wait outside the classroom whilst there was much shrieking and giggling from inside, and then I walked in to find my present waiting on my desk surrounded by candles with all the students attempting to sing Jingle Bells.
Though somewhat shrine-like, the scary doll box contained a giant apple, and there was also an apple shaped wicker basket filled with tiny bits of paper on which all the students had written wishes for me and my family. It was very sweet of them.
The Chinese obsession with apples is solid proof that they really aren’t sure what Christmas entails. Apples have come at us from all angles, beautifully wrapped in paper or bags. They are supposed to bring good fortune, and we don't have the heart to tell the students that the tradition isn’t as Christmassy as they might hope.
There was also a Christmas show put on by the English Association. It was not good. Perhaps because the microphones didn’t work. Perhaps because it was entirely in Chinese. Or perhaps because they kept dragging us Westerners out to sing songs or join in with performances.
Our totally un-prepared and atrociously performed rendition of Jingle Bells was thwarted by piles of students thrusting balloons into our arms. One girl even ran out of the crowd, hugged me and shouted that she loved me. We really are the celebrities of the college.
Apart from apples and spectacularly awful shows, the Chinese don’t really celebrate Christmas, so we had a Christmas Eve party at Olina’s house to introduce our Chinese friends to the festivities.
Mostly, they sat around watching TV, but we were merry enough for all of them.
Chrissy and Jav had bought some ‘Western’ food in Changsha so the boys set about making pasta and meatballs whilst me and Chrissy attempted a Thai red curry. There was some heated competition between Team Pasta, who eventually congealed and slightly burnt it, and Team Curry, who added too much water and then evaporated it off all over Olina’s floor. We were cooking on a small electric hob in the corner of the lounge though, so I think we did the best we could.
Here we all are with a multi-cultural feast of Chinese food, somewhat questionable Western food, and fruit cocktail surreptitiously spiked with vodka.
Later on Santa Jav appeared and gave out presents.
Celebrating Christmas with our Chinese friends was sweet, because for some of them it was their first Christmas and they were excited about everything. Also, in China, it is acceptable, if not desirable, to give the tackiest presents ever. Here's Terry with his new doll from Fiona.
After a lot of mulled wine, crackers and Christmas kareoke, we headed out to Barbara, Pingxiang’s one and only club. Chaos ensued. We probably shouldn't go back.
On Christmas morning it actually snowed. Only for a few minutes, but it was a Pingxiang Christmas miracle. We headed to a coffee bar for lunch.
Unfortunately there was a special Christmas menu all in Chinese with no pictures, so we had to take a bit of a gamble. We managed to get steak, which was great, but sadly it came with unspecified orange soup (an insult to soup everywhere), fruit salad with an incomprehensible dressing of mayonnaise, and dozens of tarts filled with grey mush that tasted a bit like sweet porridge jelly. Chrissy's face says it best.
We exchanged presents at lunch which made up for the distressing attempt at Christmas dinner. Here I am in full panda hat and ear muffs from Chrissy and Jav.
I gave Terry a giant inflatable red donkey.
He liked it a lot.
In the evening we tagged along to a banquet that Taz’s college were throwing, and then saw Christmas out with a couple of drinks in Jav and Chrissy’s apartment. More chaos ensued.
On Boxing Day we had unwisely agreed to help out a guy called Eden, who runs a chain of primary schools around the city called Crazy English. Some of us didn’t make it out of bed but Jav and I struggled round 4 different schools, giving out sweets and hats and attempting to teach the children Christmas songs. Mostly they just asked me to sing Lady Gaga.
All in all, it was a busy weekend. It felt strange not to be with family, but I certainly wasn't alone. And it was sad that Santa didn't made it to China (no doubt stopped at customs), but various gifts from very lovely people back home meant I had something to open on Christmas morning.
So, somewhat surprisingly, for all it’s peculiarities, the Chinese twist hasn’t detracted from the festive joy. Merrry (slightly late) Christmas to all!
